Saturday, February 06, 2016

Super Bowl 50: The Q&A

In our 11th installment of Super Bowl prognostications, the Super Bowl Inquisitor supplies the inquisition while I (hopefully) supply some original repartee.

It's the same old deal, except we've eschewed using Roman numerals to number the Super Bowls.

With that, let's get it on.

Super Bowl Inquisitor: As always, let’s start with the tedious questions. Lady Gaga is slated to sing the national anthem. Does that do anything for ya?
Brad: It’ll be interesting to see if she can perform a song without any of those kooky techno beats. 

SBI: I can’t speak for you, but I’m excited about Coldplay being the headliner for the halftime entertainment. 

SBI: Man. I teed that one up for ya. 

OK, now to the on field play. Do you believe this will be Peyton Manning’s final NFL game?
BC: I hope so. I haven’t seen such a significant 2-year drop off in a professional’s latter stages of a career since Clint Eastwood went from Gran Torino to Trouble with the Curve.

SBI: The Broncos’ defense was fantastic against Patriots quarterback Tom Brady in the AFC Championship Game. Can they replicate that success against Panthers QB Cam Newton? 
BC: I picture the Broncos’ D attempting to sack Newton as being similar to the efforts of the Lilliputians trying to bring down Gulliver.

SBI: Are you offended by Newton’s “dabbing” whenever he makes a big play?
BC: Nah. But I would be offended if he did the “Whip/Nae Nae.”

SBI: There’s typically a scandalous off field story during Super Bowl week, with this one being no exception. Broncos’ safety Ryan Murphy was sent home after being arrested in a prostitution sting. Your thoughts? 
BC: I’d prefer you ask Panthers’ radio guy Eugene Robinson for *his* thoughts.

SBI: What’s on the menu at your Super Bowl get-together?
BC: Hors d’oeuvres, shmor derves. Keep it simple. We’re going with Devil Dogs, a veggie tray and a vast array of diet sodas.

SBI: The Panthers are a 5-1/2 point favorite over the Broncos. How ya callin’ this one? 
BC: It’s hard to believe that a Peyton Manning led team merely needs him to be a “game manager” but that’s where we are. I think the Broncos’ defense will hold their own against Cam & Co., but Denver’s offense will be rendered ineffective. I’m going 21-17, Carolina.

In the immortal words of the ‘60s pop music group The Happenings: “See you in September!”

2015 Postseason record:
Straight up: 7-3
Against the spread: 4-6


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