Saturday, February 02, 2013

Super Bowl XLVII: The Q&A

The Super Bowl is almost upon us! In my estimation, this is one of the more intriguing matchups in a while, as we'll see the Baltimore Ravens take on the San Francisco 49ers.

With that in mind, it’s the annual Q&A with my pal Super Bowl Inquisitor and yours truly. This will be the eighth installment of this little exercise, yet it will be the first time we preview a matchup where one of the quarterbacks is not named Brady, Manning or Roethlisberger.

So, let’s tee it up and see where this goes (Huh. Sounds similar to what the fetching Mrs. Carlson said when she accepted my proposal of marriage).

Super Bowl Inquisitor: Probably the biggest storyline is the head coaches of  the Super Bowl teams being brothers. Since you're the king of analogies, is there any other scenario where another set of brothers competed in a high profile industry? 
Brad Carlson: I liken it to TV guys Greg and Bryant Gumbel. Greg is like Ravens coach John Harbaugh in that he's a dedicated, solid professional who's well respected. On the other hand, I equate Bryant with Niners coach Jim Harbaugh in the sense they're arrogant and occasionally insufferable but begrudgingly respected because they are so good at what they do.

SBI: What was your initial reaction to 49ers CB Chris Culliver's remarks disparaging gays?
BC: My very first reaction was "Who the hell is Chris Culliver?"

Secondly, how can one not be aware that such comments would quite obviously alienate the majority of the population in the very city where one plays his home games? It would be the equivalent of a member of the Chicago Bears disparaging crooked politicians.

SBI: Can you recall a more bizarre Super Bowl week story then Ravens LB Ray Lewis being alleged to have used "deer antler extract" to help him heal quicker from a torn triceps?
BC: I can not. Sheesh, what happened to the old fashioned SB week controversies, like Dallas defensive player Thomas "Hollywood" Henderson saying Pittsburgh Steelers QB Terry Bradshaw was so dumb that he couldn't spell cat if you spotted him the "c" and the "t?" At least you have some entertainment value there.

SBI: Singer Beyoncé will be providing the halftime entertainment. Were you overly offended that such a talented singer like herself lip-synched during Inauguration Day?
BC: Heh. On Inauguration Day, I was concerned with about 16.5 trillion other things above and beyond what Beyoncé did or didn't do.

SBI: The Vikings factor: Former Vikes Matt Birk and Bryant McKinnie are starting offensive linemen for Baltimore while WR Randy Moss plays for San Francisco. Any preference on who you'd like to see get their first Super Bowl ring?
BC: No preference. However, I'm thinking McKinnie is in dire need of the Super Bowl winner's bonus as well as a gaudy piece of jewelry to hock. I understand he's severely in debt to multiple Miami strip clubs.

SBI: If the 49ers win, they'll be 6-0 in Super Bowls, which would tie a record for most professional championships without a loss, currently held by the NBA's Chicago Bulls. As someone with an affinity for sports trivia, you probably knew that. 
BC: I learned that this past week, yes. Then it would be only fitting that the Niners clinch their sixth title by having Moss score the winning points after pushing off on Ravens CB Corey Graham, a la the Bulls' Michael Jordan to Utah Jazz defender Bryon Russell.

SBI: Let's wrap this up with an "either/or" segment pertaining to the Super Bowl cities. 

We'll begin with something simple. 

Food -  Pit Beef or Rice-A-Roni?
BC: Pit Beef.

SBI: Tourist Attractions -  National Aquarium or Golden Gate Bridge?
BC: Golden Gate Bridge.

SBI: Music - Tori Amos or 4 Non Blondes?
BC: Since there's only one song I know out of either of those two ("What's Up"), I gotta go with 4 Non Blondes. 

SBI: Film Directors - Barry Levinson or George Lucas?
BC: Not close - George Lucas.

SBI: Authors - Edgar Allan Poe or Mark Twain?
BC: One of my favorite sayings by Twain is "Always do right. This will gratify some and astonish the rest." That and Poe scores rather high in the bat sh-t crazy factor. So, Mark Twain it is.

SBI: Politics - Elijah Cummings or Nancy Pelosi?
BC: Yeesh! Can I pass on this one?

SBI: Fair enough. With that, the 49ers are a 3-1/2 point favorite over the Ravens. Your prediction?
BC: I say Niners win and cover (albeit barely). I'll go with 24-20 San Francisco. 

2012 Postseason record:
Straight up: 8-2
Against the point spread: 8-2


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