Robert Bork was right....again!

"I know (Senator Arlen) Specter, and the truth is not in him."-Judge Robert Bork in a 2005 CNN interview

"I am staying a Republican because I think I have an important role, a more important role, to play there."-Sen. Arlen Specter in March 2009

"I have decided to run for re-election in 2010 in the Democratic primary."-Sen. Arlen Specter in a statement released on Tuesday afternoon

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Ask a dumb question......

Last time I was home I was driving around I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of these side-of-the-road gas stations, the attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, I swear to GOD he went, "Tire go flat?"

I couldn't resist.

I said "Nope".

"No I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me."

-Bill Engvall, comedian




I often find that baseball post game interviews are some of the most tedious exercises in journalism. To a certain extent I can understand. After all, there are 162 games in a Major League Baseball season so there's only so many questions that can be posed.

This the year the Minnesota Twins have a new guy conducting post game interviews for their TV coverage on Fox Sports North. The young man named Robby Incmikoski has an uncanny ability to ask some of the most inanely obvious questions in all of sports.

After Friday's victory over Cleveland, Twins manager Ron Gardenhire was asked by Incmikoski if it felt good to lead a game from start to finish for the first time this season. Gardy yanked the young man's chain by saying how he hated leading wire-to-wire and that he actually prefers falling behind big early and then having to come back.

If I recall correctly, that was Robby's last question.

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Minnesota proud.

Check out a recent history of events in my great state that has made us a proverbial laughingstock:

-In 1998, we elected a former professional wrestler (and as it turned out, a thin-skinned bully) as our Governor. Ten years later we elected a despicable and vile human being to the US Senate.

-The "Flying Imams".

-Idaho Senator Larry Craig and his....ahem..."wide stance" in a stall at a MSP airport restroom.

-But an incident this past Wednesday at Popeye's Chicken in Minneapolis has to be the coup de grace of this 10-year run of embarrassing Minnesota moments. People literally traveled from throughout the Twin Cities metro area to save a mere $5 on an eight piece chicken meal (never mind that most spent more than that in gas or cab fare just to get to the restaurant). However, the local Popeye's franchise was not participating in an "Earth Day" discount being offered by Popeye's company owned stores. And did the patrons ever pitch a fit.

You have to see the Fox 9 news story to fully understand the sheer lunacy.

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My childhood hero turns 70!

From the time I was in first grade until third grade, I literally worshipped a guy on TV called The Six Million Dollar Man. In fact, for my seventh birthday I received the Col. Steve Austin action figure!! I was so elated in receiving this gift that I brought it to my 1st grade show-and-tell that week!





When I was in 2nd grade I had a plain metal lunch box which I brought to school every day. That thing was plastered with stickers of my hero.














Obviously I had no clue about the technology that went in to creating a “bionic man.” All I knew was that Col. Austin could run fast, crush boulders with his bare hands and jump on top of a house in a single leap. My Dad had been living in California for a few years at that time. So whenever he’d call I’d ask him how close he lived to the hometown of Steve Austin, which was Ojai, CA.

And even though I didn’t have the faintest idea what the dialogue meant, the opening TV theme to The Six Million Dollar Man was an absolute must see.





I often woke up in an excited state on Sunday mornings knowing that my favorite TV show would be on that evening.

Today, the actor who portrayed my hero (Lee Majors) turns 70 years old! That means he was around my age at the time he portrayed the bionic superhero. He’s also well known for his work in the 80s TV series The Fall Guy. Because he starred alongside the very fetching Heather Thomas, he was also a hero of mine in the 80s…but for a whoooolllle different reason!

Happy birthday “Colonel”.

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Remember when......

.....dissent was considered patriotic?

Apparently, the statute of limitations ran out just after George W. Bush left office.

Senior White House adviser David Axelrod on Sunday suggested the "Tea Party" movement is an "unhealthy" reaction to the tough economic climate facing the country.

Axelrod was asked on CBS's "Face the Nation" about the "spreading and very public disaffection" with the president's fiscal policies seen at the "Tea Party" rallies around the country last week.

"I think any time you have severe economic conditions there is always an element of disaffection that can mutate into something that's unhealthy," Axelrod said.

Axelrod appeared to backtrack when pressed on whether the movement is unhealthy.

"Well, this is a country where we value our liberties and our ability to express ourselves, and so far these are expressions," he said.

Ah, but Mr. Axelrod seemed to betray his true feelings. But I'm curious about a couple of one things: Of all the tea parties that took place nationwide last week, did any of the participants display vile depictions of President Obama? And was there any vandalism on the level of the protests at the GOP convention in St Paul last September? Trust me, had any of that taken place at the tea parties, CNN & MSNBC would have barraged us with those images. No, the media shills instead resorted to despicable "tea bagging" references.

But when the vile and invective takes place on the left, more specifically when it was aimed at the Bush administration, the media is a willing accomplice. However, the seedier side of these leftist kook protests was rarely scene.

With that, I'd like to take you on a pictorial retrospective of the left in action within the past six years (WARNING!!! Some images are extremely offensive. Proceed at your own discretion).













(photos courtesy of Protest Warrior)

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Ready to go!

In anticipation of our first softball game tomorrow evening, I decided to take a few swings at the batting cages last night.

I went three rounds, which totals 36 pitches. I never swung and missed nor did I hit a single foul ball.

I'm ready!!!!

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I'm Sorry

About 50 years ago, singer Brenda Lee belted out the ever apologetic song I'm Sorry.

In his latest foreign tour, President Obama* essentially sang the same tune.





*celebrity voice impersonated

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Another adventure in pet shenanigans.

On Saturday afternoon we took my mother-in law to her birthday lunch at the Olive Garden. Since Mom has a puppy that isn't completely kennel trained, Sophie the dog will occasionally take car rides to wherever Mom goes. Since I was driving our Saturn to lunch, Sophie would be OK in the car for an hour or two since it is still cool outside this time of year.

As we came out to the car after finishing lunch, the excited pup was wagging her tail vociferously. As soon as I opened the driver's side door Sophie excitedly leaped into the driver's seat. So excited was this canine, that she lost control of what I thought would be a minuscule bladder. But given the large puddle formed in the driver's seat, Sophie appears to have a sizable holding tank. I frantically searched my trunk for something to wipe the seat. Thankfully, there was a large plastic bag which I could place on the seat for the ten mile ride home.

As we learned with our cat last month, animals often communicate with messages from within.

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Hangin' with the right crowd.

A wise man once said that there are three types of people in this world: Those that help you, those that hurt you and those who make no difference. Naturally, it would behoove all of us to associate as much as possible with those who help us. And when I say "help" I mean those folks who can motivate and inspire us.

So when I received an e-mail from John "Night Writer" Stewart that my good pal (and John's future son-in law) Ben would be sharing his testimony to a group of young men on Saturday, it wasn't a question that I'd be there. Because most of the audience were from one of the largest residential drug and alcohol programs in the state of Minnesota, Ben's amazing story of overcoming twelve years of alcoholism seemed to be a timely message.

While Ben passionately detailed his past struggles with booze, he also had a wide-reaching message of faith. What I got out of it is that we can diligently plan for our future but then be struck by the biblical truth that God's "thoughts are not our thoughts, neither are our ways His ways." I guess that's something I've always known. But when thinking more about it, I realized how I've done things in the past that I thought was God's plan for my life because I was at peace with it. However, things later got sidetracked because what I was doing wasn't necessarily God's will. At times, believers (myself included) have a tendency to dive into something without diligent prayer. Oftentimes it's because we're afraid of what God may tell us.

To me, Ben is a perfect example of "stepping out of the comfort zone" to fulfill God's will for his life. While Ben thought he would take his time with life after successfully completing his alcohol treatment program, God had other plans. The church where Ben grew up offered to sponsor his education at Seminary. Naturally, Ben was absolutely incredulous. He couldn't figure how a kid who had been an alcoholic for twelve years could possibly dive into such a venture a mere few months after emerging from treatment. But what I got out that aspect of the story was this: God doesn't call the equipped. He equips those whom He calls.

There was also a moment of jocularity during Ben's talk. When talking about how he met John for the first time about four years ago, Ben delved into how that friendship unwittingly led to meeting the woman he will marry on May 23rd. Ben talked about meeting John's family for the first time. "John had this daughter", Ben said. "And a gun", John shouted from the back of the room. Ah, but the evolving of Ben and Faith's relationship is a true testament of doing things God's way.

I have said before that I've gotten more out this humble little site than I have ever put in to it. Just knowing a guy like Ben Worley is not only a blessing but also an inspiration.

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John Madden parks the bus.

Broadcast legend John Madden is retiring after 30 seasons in the booth.

The Hall of Fame coach spent the last three seasons on NBC's "Sunday Night Football." His final telecast was the Super Bowl in February.

"You know at some point you have to do this -- I got to that point," Madden said on his Bay Area radio show Thursday. "The thing that made it hard is not because I'm second-guessing, 'Is it the right decision?' But I enjoyed it so damn much.

"I enjoyed the game and the players and the coaches and the film and the travel and everything."

Cris Collinsworth will replace Madden, moving over from the network's studio show, NBC Sports chief Dick Ebersol said. Collinsworth filled in when Madden took a game off last October.

John Madden discusses what the Hall of Fame means to him.

Ebersol called Madden "absolutely the best sports broadcaster who ever lived."

Since 1969, Madden has been a staple in the NFL. He was head coach of the Oakland Raiders for ten seasons, accumulating a .763 winning percentage with one Super Bowl title.

Upon retiring from coaching after the 1978 season, Madden joined CBS and proceeded to stay there for fifteen seasons until the network lost their NFL rights to Fox. Madden also owns the distinction as the only broadcaster in history to call an NFL game on all four of the major TV networks.

He also lent his name to the most successful sports home video game as well as having been a pitch man for Miller Lite, Tinactin and Outback Steak House.

But much to his chagrin, Madden was brilliantly impersonated by comedian Frank Caliendo. Check out a couple of clips I found from 2002.

- Caliendo called in to a radio show where Troy Aikman was a guest. For a split second, Aikman honestly thought it was Madden on the air.

- During Madden’s first season on ABC’s Monday Night Football, an unsuspecting Outback manager thinks Madden himself is calling to make dinner reservations.

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Fancy a spot of tea?

On a whim, I decided to check out the "tea party" at the Minnesota State Capitol Wednesday evening. I had heard that many of my good friends were going to be in attendance so I just couldn't miss it.

Given the lefty media has barraged viewers with their condescending "tea bag" references, I didn't anticipate any favorable media coverage, if any at all. But that doesn't bother me in the least. The fact is thousands of people met up at the Capitol Wednesday to express their concern and dismay with the out-of-control tax burden, wasteful government spending and "porkulus" packages. We certainly don't need any media coverage to become mobilized and energized against the government's overreaching on spending.

Of course, the Obama apologists cite how the President's plan actually reduces income tax on 95% of the Americans. That's all fine and dandy, but what they fail to mention is how that tax savings will be eaten up by increases in other taxes as well as limiting certain income tax deductions.

With Sue Jeffers M.C.ing the event, the lineup of speakers included former radio host and current candidate for MN GOP chair Dave Thompson, CCHC President Twila Brase, 2008 GOP Congressional candidate Barb Davis White and KTLK morning host Chris Baker. In fact, it was Baker who had the one-liner of the night. Baker was railing on Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) and how he has never had a real job yet is Chair of the House Financial Services Committee. Baker then said "You know what the difference is between Barney Frank and myself? Lipstick!!"

We've got approximately 18 months until the next election. And let's hope the momentum that got started Wednesday evening continues to build up.


With Dave Thompson, candidate for MN GOP chair.











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I still got it!!!!

It was the summer of 1988 when I was working as a cashier at a West St Paul convenience store. The radio home of the Twins back then was AM 830 WCCO, which I happened to have on at work. As I was ringing up a purchase, I heard the ‘CCO radio guy announce that in five minutes they would be giving away an eight-pack of tickets to the first caller to correctly answer a trivia question. I waited with gleeful anticipation since I was such a sports trivia aficionado. Sure enough, I knew the answer to their inquiry: What was the score of the first regular season Twins game in the Metrodome? I correctly answered 11-7 and thus won choice seats behind home plate for a Saturday afternoon game that September!

I am happy to report that I still have that gift, and all without the help of Ginkgo biloba. As I was driving home Tuesday evening, AM 1500’s Matt Thomas was announcing a chance to win four Twins tickets to an upcoming Twins game. With the Toronto Blue Jays in town this week, the question pertained to the fact that, as of Tuesday afternoon, the Twins had not beaten the Jays since June 2007. The question asked was Who was the winning pitcher in that June ’07 contest and what was the historical significance of that game? I had no clue who the pitcher was until I heard the second part of the question. I recall Frank Thomas hitting his 500th career home run off Carlos Silva. However, I couldn’t recall if Silva stayed in long enough to get the victory.

After about five minutes of getting a busy signal, I got through. Since no one had answered correctly at that point, I had my shot. I guessed Silva as being the winning pitcher. I was told that was correct. Then I mentioned the Frank Thomas milestone. The call screener was silent for three seconds and then said “hold on.” I then heard Matt Thomas’ broadcast over the phone and was ecstatic when he announced the following: “We have a winner in our Twins ticket giveaway. Brad from Ramsey answered our question correctly. He will receive four tickets to see the Twins take on the Tampa Bay Rays on Tuesday, April 28.”

Dang, I’m good!!!!

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Mark "The Bird" Fidrych: 1954-2009

What a shock to hear of the death of a true baseball legend, a guy nicknamed "The Bird".

Mark "the Bird" Fidrych, the fun-loving pitcher who baffled hitters for one All-Star season and entertained fans with his antics, was found dead Monday in an apparent accident at his farm. He was 54.

Worcester County district attorney Joseph D. Early Jr. said a family friend found Fidrych about 2:30 p.m. Monday beneath a dump truck at his Northborough, Mass., farm about 35 miles west of Boston. He appeared to have been working on the truck, Early said.

The curly-haired right-hander was the American League Rookie of the Year in 1976 when he went 19-9 with a 2.34 ERA and 24 complete games. But injuries cut short his career, and he ended up spending only five seasons in the major leagues, all with the Detroit Tigers. He was 29-19 with a 3.10 ERA.

Certainly Fidrych's shortened career numbers aren't what make him "legendary". Whether it was manicuring the dirt on the mound or talking to himself prior to every pitch, Fidrych made a name for himself as one of the daffiest characters the game has ever seen.

One of my favorite stories came courtesy of Yankees third baseman Graig Nettles. During Fidrych's stellar '76 season, the Tigers visited Yankee Stadium in September. As a practical joke, Nettles sprinkled bird seed on the mound whenever he went from the first base dugout to third base between innings. Fidrych proceeded to shut out the eventual AL champion Yankees that night, as well as eat the bird see left on the mound.

This 1985 interview with Fidrych is indicative of his personality: an odd character who loved the game of baseball. Sadly Fidrych's life, like his memorable baseball career, ended much too soon.




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From the resurrection to the rapture.

It isn’t just Easter when I think of the resurrection of Jesus Christ. In fact, I often acknowledge it in prayer when thanking God for blessing us “exceedingly, abundantly above what we could ever think or ask.” Think about it. If God had never bestowed one blessing upon us in our entire existence on Earth, just giving the life of His only son so that we may have eternal life is a debt we’ll never be able to repay. And through His grace and mercy, we don’t have to!

But when I think of the resurrection, I find myself contemplating Jesus’ return to bring His people home. Sure, there’s been endless speculation and countless theories as to when that blessed event will occur. In fact, I hear you can get a great discount on a book entitled 88 Reason Why the Rapture will be in 1988.

Other incorrect estimations of Jesus’ return were based on the verses in Matthew 24:1-33, which describe end-time events in relation to Israel. Then Matthew 24:34 states that this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. Since Israel became a nation in 1948 and the standard generation is estimated at 52.4 years, many calculated Jesus’ return around 2000-2001. But as Jesus himself explicitly states in Matthew 24:36, ”No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.”

But if one does indeed reads the entire 24th chapter of Matthew, one could easily surmise that the second coming is imminent. Again, only our Father God knows the exact hour. Nevertheless, it’s still interesting to try and pinpoint a time frame.

2 Peter 3:8 says But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. Taken literally, a thousand years is equivalent to 24 hours, meaning there are 41.7 years per hour. After his crucifixion, Jesus rose from the dead early on the third day. Now let us assume that Jesus’ second coming would parallel His resurrection. If indeed a day is like a thousand years, this point in time is definitely “early” on the third day after the crucifixion. And if Jesus rose from His grave early in the morning, then His return for His bride will occur “early” in this millennium. How early? Suppose He arose at, say, 1:00 a.m. on the third day. One hour after the beginning of a day would equate to approximately 42 years. If that’s the case, Jesus is slated to return in 2042. That means a distinct possibility of my being alive to see it!

Whatever the case, we can all rejoice that there is a tomb that has been empty for more than two thousand years. And that is why we commemorate this wonderful holiday.

Have a very blessed Easter everyone!

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New show on AM 1500

Gotta admit, the promo doesn't do a lot for me.

Dear Brad,

As promised, here is some info on the new radio show that debuts this morning and will air each weekday 9:00 a.m. until 1:00 p.m.

FOUR HOURS??!!!! UGH!

There are enough agendas in the world. This is a talk show about the day's top stories from a distinctively upper Midwestern perspective, including a dose of skeptical humor and subtle sarcasm. Even the most serious of topics, there is a laugh to be had in there somewhere.

Prebil & Murphy is Shawn Prebil and Chris Murphy join AM1500 with several years of hosting radio shows, most recently teamed for a few years in Madison, WI.

Murphy, a native of Apple Valley, is a struggling parent of two young daughters, yet Prebil knows everything about parenting because he has no children.

Give them a few listens and let me know what you think. (Keep in mind, Joe Soucheray's first week many told me he would never work out.)

Maybe. But the same thing was also said about Chris Krok and Willie Clark.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts on Prebil & Murphy.

Cheers,

Steve Konrad
Program Director
am1500 KSTP

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Bob Davis gone at AM 1500; Dave Thompson to run for MN GOP chair (UPDATED).

Hangin' with Bob Davis at Keegan's Irish Pub (July 2007).



From an e-mail I received from AM 1500 KSTP:

Bob Davis is no longer with AM1500 KSTP. His last show was today, April 7.

Bob's contributions over the last eight years are appreciated and we wish him well. His effervescent demeanor, his always-ready belly laugh and his iconic head of hair leave a lasting impression on all who meet him.

Starting Thursday morning at 9am, we will have a brand new radio program for the Twin Cities. I could tell you their names (yes, a two-person show), but you have not heard of them. They are new to Twin Cities radio, but not new to upper Midwest radio and both guys have personal ties to the Twin Cities metro.

Expect an e-mail from me Thursday morning about 8am with further details.

I am excited about this addition to AM1500 KSTP and I encourage you to share your view of them after you give them a few listens.

As for Dave Thompson, I think you may be interested in the headline of a news release that was issued earlier this afternoon:

Dave Thompson Announces Candidacy to become next State Chair of the Minnesota Republican Party

UPDATE: My pal "Chief" posted the press release of Dave Thompson's announcement.

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Goodbye, Steve-O

One of my all-time favorite radio hosts passed away Monday.

Steve Cannon, one of the most unforgettable voices in the history of Twin Cities radio and for years the highest-rated afternoon drive host in the country, died late Monday after a short, fierce battle with cancer.

Cannon died just after 10 p.m. Monday at his home near Minneapolis' Lake of the Isles, surrounded by family members. He was 81.

It was my sophomore year in college when I really became familiar with the dulcet tones of the baritone-voiced Cannon. At that point in my college career, I commuted everyday from St Paul to River Falls, WI (25 miles one way) because I couldn’t find a reliable car pool that fit my schedule. I was driving a piece of junk Ford Farimont which featured an AM only radio.

WCCO radio was a big part of my life since they were the official Twins station. So on my way home from school I would switch on 830 AM (Sports station KFAN would not come around for another three years). Since Cannon’s show was on from 3-6, I would invariably catch some portion of his program. However, I always enjoyed the beginning, simply because I got a kick out of that crazy show intro featuring the barking dogs.

I also liked Cannon's program because there were some regular segments for which I was sure to tune in. On Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 3:30 he would have on some guy from Hollywood named James St. James to talk entertainment news (i.e. what celebrities were up to, the latest movies to come out, etc.). Then at about 4:40 everyday he’d talk sports with the man he dubbed “The Oracle”, Sid Hartman. And whenever Cannon had to cut to one of his many commercial breaks, he would proclaim “I gotta go make some money!” As a result, Cannon wrapped up his show every evening by saying ”I got the money.”

Even though Cannon worked by himself in the famed “basement studio”, he was never “alone”. The cast of characters he created from his own mind were there everyday to give their own unique analysis on whatever Cannon was talking about. Yes, I can still hear clearly the voices of “Morgan Mundane”, “Backlash LaRue” and “Ma Linger”.

Cannon’s final show with WCCO took place in October 1997. His retirement from the public eye rivals that of Johnny Carson. Once he signed off the air one last time, Cannon completely shunned the public eye. And much like Carson’s retirement, the public rarely heard about Cannon again. That is, until literally the end.

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NORTH CAROLINA TAR HEELS!!!

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Partying like it's 1980-something (UPDATED)

Yes, it’s true. I still love the 80s!!! So it’s no surprise that I’ve had an absolute blast this week watching VH1’s 100 Greatest One Hit Wonders of the 80s. Thru Thursday evening they counted down song numbers 100 thru 21. Given I’m such an 80s rube “connoisseur”, I will definitely be watching tonight’s finale at 8:00 9:00 CT when VH1 commences with the top 20 songs.

My co-worker (and fellow 80s rube) Kevin and I collaborated on what 80s tunes will make the Top 20.

Here they are in alphabetical order:

1) 867-5309/Jenny (Tommy Tutone)
2) 99 Luftballoons (Nena)
3) Cars (Gary Numan)
4) Come on Eileen (Dexy’s Midnight Runners)
5) Hot Hot Hot (Buster Poindexter)
6) I Melt With You (Modern English)
7) I Ran (Flock of Seagulls)
8) In A Big Country (Big Country)
9) It Takes Two (Rob Base and DJ EZ Rock)
10) Mickey (Toni Basil)
11) Rapper's Delight (Sugarhill Gang)
12) Relax (Frankie Goes to Hollywood)
13) Rock Me Amadeus (Falco)
14) She Blinded Me With Science (Thomas Dolby)
15) Somebody's Watching Me (Rockwell)
16) Tainted Love (Soft Cell)
17) Take on Me (A-ha)
18) Too Shy (Kajagoogoo)
19) True (Spandau Ballet)
20) Whip It (Devo)

As far as #1 is concerned, Kev is going with Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood. But I say the smart money is on 867-5309/Jenny by Tommy Tutone.

Anyone else wanna make a case for which song is the greatest one hit wonder of the 1980s?


UPDATE: I will be doing a "live blog" as the 20 greatest one hit wonders of the 80s is being counted down. It looks as though the Top 20 will be broadcast on VH1 at 9:00 pm CT, not 8:00. I regret the error.

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UPDATE II: And now, THE TOP 20, as recited on VH1!

20) Somebody's Watching Me (Rockwell)
19) You Spin Me Round (Like a Record) (Dead or Alive)
18) It Takes Two (Rob Base and D.J. E-Z Rock)
17) The Safety Dance (Men without Hats)
16) 99 Luftballoons (Nena)
15) Whip It (Devo)
14) In a Big Country (Big Country)
13) She Blinded Me With Science (Thomas Dolby)
12) Obsession (Animotion)
11) Cars (Gary Numan)
10) Relax (Frankie Goes to Hollywood)
9) Too Shy (Kajagoogoo)
8) I Want Candy (Bow Wow Wow)
7) I Melt With You (Modern English)
6) Mickey (Toni Basil)
5) Tainted Love (Soft Cell)
4) 867-5309/Jenny (Tommy Tutone)
3) Take On Me (A-Ha)
2) I Ran (A Flock of Seagulls)
1) Come on Eileen (Dexy's Midnight Runners)

So there you have it! Kev and I got 16 out of 20. Not bad. We missed song numbers 8, 12, 17 and 19, but who cares. I'll take any and every opportunity to talk 80s music!!

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New blog

In the 3 ½ years I’ve been blogging regularly, I’ve met a lot fantastic people in the Minnesota Organization of Bloggers. In fact, a lot of my fellow MOB members can echo that very sentiment. But in the entire 5-6 year run of this group, there is only one couple I know of who met via the MOB and decided to get married. And I can’t tell you how thrilled I am for these kids. Well, wait a minute. I think the term “kids” may be pushing it. After all, Ben is only six years my junior. And Faith hardly seems like a kid even though I am old enough to be her Da… Dad’s younger friend.

Either way, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed getting to know Ben & Faith over these past couple of years. And they have graciously put together a new blog documenting how their courtship began as well as looking ahead to their nuptials in a mere seven weeks. Check it out. They have a great story!!

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Memories of April Fools past.

I’m not the biggest prankster I know but I have pulled some mighty fine April Fools’ jokes in years past. In fact, there are two in particular which really stand out.

I pulled a dandy on a co-worker of mine 12 years ago! Since I was working in a smaller company at that time, I had to share an office with a gal named Jean. She liked to rib me incessantly about any number of things so I felt comfortable in devising an April Fools joke at her expense. Since Jean was in collections, she was the contact person for customers to call when they had a question about invoices, payments, etc. So while Jean was out to lunch I had a female friend of mine call her voice mail with the following message:

Hi, this is Ellie and I have a question regarding an invoice on our February statement. I can be reached at 952-XXX-XXXX. Now there are two of us here named Ellie so be sure and ask for me. My last name is “Funt”.

The phone number I had my friend reference was the number to the Minnesota Zoo in Apple Valley. My plan was for Jean to call the Zoo number and ask for “Ellie Funt”. And it worked like a charm!!! The woman on the other end of the phone laughed uproariously and then informed Jean that someone must be playing an April Fools joke. By this time, I’m sure my face was three shades of purple, which gave me away. So upon ending the phone call, Jean chucked various objects at me.

Three years later, in the year 2000, my gal and I met some friends at their house on this Saturday afternoon. From there, we were going to a local Fuddrucker’s to have lunch. At this time in their lives our friends Tony & Michelle, who would be in our wedding party three months later, had a 2 ½ year old daughter and another girl due in a month. Tony kind of slapped me on the back and said ”Someday you’ll have little ones of your own running around.” That kind of rhetoric had grown rather wearisome since Tony & Michelle were obsessed with having kids right after they got married. And they did. Apparently they were incredulous that not everyone felt the same way. The fact of the matter was Jen & I wanted to wait at least a few years before we even made a decision about children.

Instead of lashing out at Tony, I decided to mess with him a little bit. I told him that a few weeks before the wedding I was going to get the ol’ “snip, snip.” That’s right, the Big “V” (and I don’t mean Vegas)! He initially laughed, thinking I was kidding. But I managed to say it with a straight face even though I darn near ruptured an internal organ trying to keep from cracking up. A few minutes later, Jen and I drove to the restaurant with Tony & Michelle following us. Once we sat down to eat, Michelle was conspicuously silent. I later found out why. Tony told her in the car of my “plans” to ensure there would no kids in our future. Michelle was so distraught by this "development" that she and Tony proceeded to pray for us the entire 10-minute drive to the restaurant.

As we finished lunch, we said our goodbyes. I then said to Tony ”Oh, by the way, what day is today?” Tony replied, “Uh, Saturday, why?” I then said ”April 1st, right?”

Tony laughed hysterically. Michelle was downright ticked. Oh well, I think I made my point.

Today is a busy day so I don’t think I’ll be adding to my lore of April 1st humor. But it's fun to look back!!

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It's pretty cool....

...to live in a somewhat rural area where there are deer sauntering through the back yard.

The down side of that? They have a tendency to leave behind "gifts" resembling steaming piles.


Do you realize that's the second post in a week in which you've told a story about feces?


Well, if I do say so myself, I did write an insightful post last week about President Obama's budget proposal.


Oh, right. Make that three posts about piles of dung.

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